My blog hasn’t been self-deprecating enough lately. It’s time I pull these jewels from my arsenal. I bring to you… seventh grade. Quite possibly my most offensive year in regards to my appearance.
I’m the one on the left. Just kidding! I could never be that tan, even if I tried. I’m the one on the right. The drop dead sexy girl with the glasses. The one with thighs the same size as her arms. The little fashionista sporting the outfit straight out of Teen magazine. The one who, given the good fortune to meet them, would have surely received a proposition of marriage from one or more of the NKOTB boys. The one you’re currently daydreaming about punching in the face.
Clearly, those were my fave shorts.
Ah, yearbooks. Timeless confirmation of my stunning good looks in middle school. See that smile on my face? That smile is my way of saying, “This yearbook makes me want to go home and kill myself. Thanks for asking.”
Yes, I really wanted to kill myself. Sad, no? Glad I didn’t. I know y’all would be bummed if you couldn’t read my blog.
Love you long time!
How does time evaporate so quickly? You blink and a month has passed. As Ferris Bueller put it, “Life goes by pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
Just over one month ago, we had Jonah dedicated at church. It seems like yesterday we had Noah dedicated.
Jonah is such a sweet baby. Too bad his pants are hiked up like he’s expecting a flood. I didn’t mean to make him look like a dork.
I recently experienced déjà vu:
Nathan, age 4
Noah, age 2
This is not the first time it’s happened. Remember this?
p.s. – Happy birthday (belated, today, and tomorrow) to Jeremy, Mike, Dani, and Josh!
An excerpt from the book: Every Day Was an Adventure and I Didn’t Even Know It (A Collection of Stories and Events in the Life of Reid Patterson Gilland)
“In this book I have written of strangers, events, and places that were part of my life, and I have hardly mentioned the single most important thing that ever happened to me. Thelma Torrence Gilland. For over 60 years I have known the complete love of a devoted woman, one who has carried me through the hardest of times, has been my enthusiastic supporter in the best of times, my strength in times of needs. We have taken our wedding vows of “for better or for worse” and “in sickness and in health” to the limit at times, but our marriage is solid. We have endured the most solemn seriousness and we have enjoyed delicious silliness of togetherness that has had no limits. With these same words of tribute for our children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren this is a good way to close. All my life, every day has been an adventure and I didn’t even know it! All things considered, my life has been fun!”
Reid Patterson Gilland
November 2, 1921 – November 10, 2009
“All things considered, my life has been fun!”
Reid, I hope I’ll be able to say the same thing at the end of my life. See you on the other side.
The Pioneer Woman (a.k.a. Ree Drummond a.k.a. celebrity blogger) just had her longest Twitter conversation EVER with one of my best male friends EVER: the incomparable Samuel Oliver Blowes (S.O.B. not for short – simply call him Sam or, more appropriately, Pastor Sam). OH MY WORD. I mean, it’s practically like they are BFF now. For serious. Next thing you know she’ll be flying his entire family to her amazing ranch. I have copy/pasted their communication below. Try to not be jealous of Sam, even though he’s obviously a very big deal now.
Noah is mildly obsessed with trucks, so we recorded a monster truck show on our DVR. He loves it! Watch this video to see how excited he gets. I could be wrong, but it sure sounds like he says, “Oh, he be crazy!” a few times. lol
A couple weeks ago I had a contest for the best facebook face. Apparently, not everyone understood exactly what I meant by “facebook face.”
Well, a friend sent me a link to a web site devoted solely to this non-sexy yet wildly popular trend: antiduckface.com The site had me laughing hysterically and I immediately subscribed.
Warning: They don’t hold back on profanity, so if that sort of things offends you, it would be best for you to NOT visit the site.
1. You can say stuff like “I can make fun of fat people because I are one” and get away with it.
2. Your description of the O roll at Harbor Docks.
3. How you consider flip-flops your dress shoes, even when you’re preaching or officiating a wedding.
4. Pretty much everything you say when your filter (a.k.a. Darlene) isn’t sitting in the front row at church.
5. How you can be the funniest person I’ve ever known…
6. And then not be afraid to show your sensitive side.
7. You’re an ENFJ, so I totally get where you’re coming from.
8. When you laugh really hard and your face turns red. This always happens after you’ve said something naughty.
9. When you start talking about church stuff and you get all choked up and your voice cracks and you get tears. So sweet.
10. How you’re an inspiration to everyone around you.
Happy birthday to my most favorite preacher man ever!
Hurricane Tropical Storm Ida is a total wuss. I’m not sure if I’m relieved or disappointed. There’s something to be said about spending the day on my couch watching Jim Cantore give a play-by-play as Stephanie Abrams battles the elements on The Weather Channel. Maybe it’s a Southern thing? Or should I say, a Gulf Coast resident thing? So, it’s kind of disappointing that we’re basically feeling nothing from this storm. Boring! However, I am relieved that we’re not experiencing a repeat of Ivan, Andrew, or Katrina.
Although Tropical Storm Ida is a wuss, I can tell you about an Ida who was NOT a wuss… my grandmother.
My grandfather Herb, who will celebrate his 90th birthday next month, married my grandmother Ida in 1944 (click here for super slick photos). She was only 20 on their wedding day, but could have easily taken him in a fight. She was a super tough tomboy. (That trait was obviously not passed down to me.) In fact, rumor has it that SHE carried HIM over the threshold!
Ida died of cancer in August 1984 at the age of 60. I had just started second grade and didn’t get to attend the funeral with my dad. I’m not sure if it was the expense of flying our family of four from Virginia to Florida or that my dad didn’t feel it was necessary for a child of my age to attend. I know she was already gone at that point, but it’s always made me sad that I wasn’t there for her funeral.
How hot is my aunt? For realz!
I’m pretty sure my dad and my aunt still wear those outfits regularly. And I’m 100% confident my granddad still wears that outfit.
Yes, I know I look like my dad.
For awhile, there were only three grandkids (those are my cousins, Brian and Gary). That little girl is so precious, is she not?! Eh-hmm.
Then my brother David was born…
…and he drove our grandfather to drink. Just kidding! Wait, is he drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon?!
I still wear my hair like that occasionally. Should I be concerned? Is it time to move on to a new hairstyle?
Some things never change… like my obnoxious smile and the view up my nostrils in every photo.
Whoa! What gaming system is THAT?!?! And more importantly…
What the crap am I wearing? No wonder my expression is so… unsettling. I apologize if this one gives you nightmares. I promise, I was not an evil child.
Enough of the pictures. Back to the post…
I love my grandfather’s wife as my grandmother, but I wish I had been given a chance to know Ida in this lifetime. I have so few memories of her, you know? I take comfort knowing we’ll be together in Heaven. We’ll have eternity to get to know each other.
p.s. – Happy birthday, Valerie and Jane!
Today I took Taylor shopping. Andy stayed home with the boys. It was nice to have a mother/daughter day.
One of the stores she wanted to shop in was Abercrombie. For those of you who don’t know, Abercrombie & Fitch is for teens, college-age, and adults who still want to be teens or college age. Abercrombie [without the Fitch] is for kids. And by kids, I mean the sizes available are for 4th-8th grade (approximately). I don’t know about you, but I consider kids in 4th-8th grade to be CHILDREN. I realize half that range is considered to be tweens, but whatever. They’re still kids.
The clothes sold at Abercrombie are fine. Other than the occasional ultra-short shorts, the clothes are appropriate for their target market.
The advertising, however, I find disturbing. Again, consider the age range for which the clothes were designed: ages 10-14.
Example 1:
The jeans are fine. But the way the model is standing? And showing her stomach with the low-cut jeans? Is it just me, or is this stance seductive? Would middle school guys not be thinking, “I’d sure like to tap that!” And what are girls thinking? They might not say it out loud, but surely they’re thinking, “If I looked like that, all the guys at school would think I was sexy.”
What? You think I’m crazy? Okay, then how about…
Example 2:
I’m a grown married woman, with children, and this picture makes me think sexy thoughts (about my husband, of course). There is nothing innocent about this pose. Lifting his shirt to show off those abs? Boxer briefs clearly visible? What part of this isn’t promoting sex? In fact, if examples 1 and 2 were next to each other in real life, they’d probably be ready to drop those jeans to the floor!
I can see you rolling your eyes. Maybe I’m reading too much into it. But there’s no denying…
Example 3:
Incidentally, this picture is currently in their online gallery with the caption, “when in doubt flirt.” Uh, you think? Where does YOUR mind wander when you look at this picture? Nothing about it promotes purity. The idea of my 12-year-old flirting and flaunting sexuality makes me want to vomit, frankly.
The kids shopping here are young and impressionable. To them, Abercrombie represents what is cool. And by looking at their advertising, children are going to assume that being sexy or, worse, having sex, is the definition of cool. Why can’t they just show pictures of kids having fun, being young, maybe playing some sports, etc? Kids age 10-14 aren’t mature enough to handle intimate relationships and are still trying to figure out the changes brought by puberty. Why confuse them with images too “old” for them? Shame on Abercrombie for marketing to children in such a way.
