I always wanted a daughter.
I always wanted a daughter. When I was five, my brother was born. I had hoped so much for a sister… a real live doll. My parents made up for my disappointment by giving me countless dolls. They were all girls, of course.
Over the next several years, I received more brothers. Both half and step, thanks to parental remarriages. But never a sister. I was the only girl surrounded by testosterone. As time passed, I knew I would never have a sister, but held onto hope for a baby girl of my own. A daughter.
A few months after my nineteenth birthday, I got pregnant. I didn’t have health insurance, so determining the gender before birth via an ultrasound wasn’t an option. I secretly wanted a girl, but I didn’t get my hopes up.
February 28, 1997, arrived. It was ten days before my due date, but it was time. We went to the hospital. Labor was about 14 hours long. Thanks to no insurance and no money, an epidural wasn’t an option. I thought I might die the last 3 hours. I had back labor and my butt bone actually shifted out a couple inches. It was fantastic. Actually, it sucked really bad. I can’t even describe the pain. To this day, I still look like I have a tail. Only intense reconstructive surgery can fix it.
Three quick pushes and the baby was out. The doctor announced that we had a girl. I was shocked… elated… in denial… and completely ecstatic. I had my daughter! The nurses checked her and let Andy carry her to me. He said, “She’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen!” And I had to agree.
Taylor was the sweetest baby ever. She rarely cried, always smiled, and we could bring her anywhere with full confidence she would display exemplary behavior. She was indeed amazing.
I had always envisioned having a daughter with brown hair and blue eyes. And that’s exactly what I got.
When Taylor was two, she informed me that she was no longer going to call me Mommy. Instead, she wanted to call me Mama. And she has every time since that day, even now.
In May 2002, Taylor was almost 5.5 years old. One night she demonstrated her hula-hoop abilities for my friend Lori. Lori told Taylor she was talented, then added that she was pretty and a very special girl. Taylor replied, “Yeah, I like the way God made me.”
When Taylor was in kindergarten, each child in her class was given a heart on Valentine’s Day that said “Love is ______________” and they would have to fill in the blank. Taylor wrote: “Love is helping people when they are hurt.”
When Taylor was eight, we were driving one night listening to Matt Redman’s song “Facedown.” There’s a line that says, “And I’ll fall facedown, as Your glory shines around.” Just as that line finished, Taylor said, “Mama? When you hear songs like this, do you ever get tears in your eyes?” I said yes. But truthfully, her question gave me more tears than any song ever has.
I take that back. There’s one song that can make me cry more than her question. This one.
I always wanted a daughter. Thank you, God, for giving me above and beyond what I ever imagined. Happy 12th birthday, Taylor Christine!
Man, that was awesome. Happy birthday Taylor. I can’t believe you’re not a little peanut anymore. But, I’m glad you live closer, so I can see you grow. xoxo, The Quarriers
Happy Birthday to the cutest little flower girl ever. I’m not surprised in the least at what a beautiful young woman she’s becoming!!!
Lori- that was so sweet!! Happy Birthday Taylor!! I’ve loved watching you grow and love the memories of going to Disney World together and spending time with you and your Mama. Have a wonderful day!!
Wow! I have tears streaming down my face. How beautiful! Happy Birthday, Taylor!!!
happy birthday taylor sorry i cant be there but i hope you have a good day!
,Imy
I loved that! Both the words and the photos were truly beautiful. Happy Birthday, Taylor!
I’ll never forget Taylor’s birthday because it’s my most favorite day of the year…..the Lord gave me my two boys 2 years apart. Chase turned 7 today and Connor turned 5 today. February 28th is indeed a wonderful day for little children to be born!
Happy Birthday Tay-lo!!
Love,
LeAnne from Jacksonville
I miss that Taylor. Hope you’re all having an awesome day. Happy b’day miss Tay. Love you bunches. Mr. Matt
Lori, that was beautiful, I’m going to cry.. thanks for posting. The pics are so good!
Happy Birthday, Taylor!
That was precious. Just like Taylor. I’m so glad that Amber has a friend like her.
Very sweet blog – but not accurate. First, I was born a boy, but you dressed and treated me like a girl. Second, mom’s third husband had two girls. Third, Taylor has not grown since she was three, and I refuse to hear otherwise.
Eldest Bro, since the 3rd marriage lasted 5 seconds, I couldn’t really count those sisters.
But it WAS fun dressing you like a girl. You were pretty. All those curls!
Wow, happy birthday to a beautiful, talented gal with so many gifts. Taylor has that wonderful, hard to come by mix of spunk and grace. It’s an honor to know you, sweetie!
That was so sweet. Tay is truly the main reason we decided to have kids. Wow!
Granddaddy and I are so proud of you Taylor and so thankful God gave us a sweet Greatgranddaughter, God was good, God only seems to give one girl to each parent, none of us have a sister but we are thankful for our brothers. We love you.
Happy Birthday Taylor! I don’t even know where the years have gone. When I met you and your mommy you were sleeping in a little bed next to your mama’s–And you would run around with your curls bouncing while we were studying–captured my heart! Hope we get to see you all again someday!
lv-tiffany perry
Happy Birthday, Taylor! I can’t believe you are 12! I know your mom and dad are EXTREMELY proud of the person you’ve become. I also can’t believe that lovely little flower girl from mine and Tiffany’s wedding is getting so grown up! We can’t wait to introduce you to our boys!!
-Ryan
This is the best blog of all time.
This is my 1st fav. Why, because I have a daughter too, every word of this blog is beautiful and heartfelt, and it is celebrating a wonderful girl. It also made me blubber like a big ol baby…
Lori, that blog made me cry… That was so so sweet. Anna is only 3 months now and I can’t imagine her turning 12. What a blessing children are. There is nothing more amazing.
Hi Lori,
I have gone to the Daniel study a few times and met you there. Out of town travels and life stuff has kept me from the group for the last several weeks. I am not sure how but I tripped upon this sight, I think I was looking for a spaghetti recipe Cortney sited. That was five hours ago! I have been reading, crying, and thanking God for you and your willingness to share your stories. Yesterday was a bad day in my marriage, you see. Talk of splitting up and what are we going to do where touched upon. Bruce and I have been married almost twenty years, we have three beautiful children, 12, 14, 16. Well this morning we sat, talked, cried and decided to keep on working on our dreams together. Your blogs reminded me of where we were; the joy, the fun, the youth, the excitement of starting our lives together. Time blew by, stresses and the world crept in, the kids turned to teen-agers and we became exhausted juggling ours and their lives. I had forgotten that the simple joys of marriage and family are the glue that keeps us together, your blog reminded me of those joys. Days like yesterday are horrible because I lost sight of the joys and gifts God has so graciously poured out on my family and I. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for lifting a spirit that had been down. You Rock!